Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Allegheny Cemetery and the Recent Rise of the Dead


Jared and I recently took a walk in the Allegheny Cemetery. It was the first time that I was actually inside the cemetery, and it was an amazing experience. I have driven past countless times but to actually go inside and see the beauty of the place--it is something that should not be missed. I am just sorry that it didn't happen before now.

Of course being how we not only took this time to awe and bask in the beauty but to take up some concerns with the layout. Jared and I are concerned with the reanimation of the corpses when the Zombies decide to attack. We feel, like many others that the City has an obligation to the public to make sure that what comes out of the ground is enclosed within a safe perimeter.

Now, while the cemetery is beautiful, it has many gaps in the fences and many places where the fences (stone and metal) need to be reinforced. In our perimeter check of the property we found many places where they could escape and infect the rest of the city.

The first thing that the city must do is to reinforce the perimeter. Next we need to make sure that the perimeter is guarded day and night to ensure that the Zombies do not make an escape nor decide to rise before we are ready for them.

Jared and I are currently drafting a letter to the Board to make sure that they know we mean business. This is terrifying stuff. Imagine a world that is overrun by the living dead.
This is not a sight that I wish to be around to see. Granted, it is all fun and games in the movies. Real Zombie attacks would not be the same.

There Jared and I are planning, thinking, exploring all that we can to make the city safer. We come up with exit plans, defense strategies, power point ideas, pictures, and even live demonstrations for when the Board decides to call us back.

This is all taking up time and energy. Then....to our dismay. The resident Zombie expert Bryan "I am going to ruin all the fun" Pwaite decides to listen to our plans.

"So what are you really worried about, them escaping or protecting from them coming in?" Asked in a very snooty I know more than you will ever type of voice.

"Well we are worried about the Zombies escaping." I think that this is obvious and so does Jared.

"You do realize you have it all wrong right? Corpse can not reanimate. They are dead so they stay dead. They wouldn't just come back to life." Said with a smile on his face.

Party pooper. Granted I am sure he is right since he has read up and has his weapons ready for the day when they do attack. But it still ruined our fun and maybe we will just change our letter to, Protection from attack inside out, to Protection from attack, outside in.

Here are some valuable websites if anyone else is concerned about the impending doom of the Zombie rising.


This link is for the cemetery. I am sure from the site you can see why we were concerned.


A great blog and website with EVERYTHING one might need to make their house and life Zombie proof.

Another link that I got some pictures from.

2 comments:

  1. I think the living dead are already among us: The mayor and the county council must be zombies, how else can you explain their recent inactions except that their brains are dead.

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  2. Pittsburgh county council inactive?! And the mayor inactive!! That is unbelievable. They are the greatest! They always make sure that the roads are clear of snow, they favor the residents to big business...OH wait.....

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